"i fear i shall never get enough of you, my dear

this was written and posted on my old tumblr on november 19, 2010. it's lovely to read back through all of the posts that i wrote as i was falling in love with andrew. this made me want to cry because i miss him so much.

darling friend,

it’s been a few months since the music indoctrinations began. since the library walks started to become a routine. since we established our shared love of cardigans/sweaters.

somehow, while we were walking, singing, driving, climbing (trees!), skipping, puddling, crunching, reading, shopping, eating, etc, i fell for you.

i try to look back and see that moment when exactly i knew that i wanted to stay by your side for a long time (possibly forever).

it may have been when you tried greek dancing with me.

or maybe our 1:30am trip to waffle house.

was it when we were picking out all of those great old man sweaters at salvation army?

maybe when you met my family and they loved you and you loved them right back?

maybe it was when you made me laugh so much that i fell in a bunch of leaves.

was it all of those times that you looked at me with those lovely brown eyes and laughingly told me how ridiculous i was?

or maybe that morning 6 days ago when we decided that this would be official?

how about the time i randomly decided that i was hungry for egg rolls, so we bought some.

or when you were going to surprise me with an umbrella…it is the thought that counts…

what about the two shiny pennies and the wishes in the dark?

or last night when you texted me that i am “the finest example of a woman i’ve ever had the privilege of knowing…”

the more i think about it, the more i become awed by this situation. i honestly don’t think it was any specific event that made me fall for you. it was always being with you. knowing that i have your support. always being able to rant to you if i have the need to do so. sitting in silence while doing our homework. feeling your hand touch my knee for a split second before you go back to reading. loving life with you. being your best friend more than anything.

i think dreams really do come true.

you make me feel like a princess, a proper lady, a little girl and an old woman all at the same time =)

thanks for being such a pal. for being the best boyfriend ever. for being all that i ever hoped and dreamed for. you’re so good.

i can’t wait to see you at dinner tonight. and tightly hold your hand. and smile up at you. and feel the butterflies in my tummy.

sincerely,

bailzebub

andrew, whenever you read this...i love you with all of me. happy 1 year and 4 months today :P