my newest favorite television program is the show "new girl". it's about a quirky teacher (zooey deschanel) who, upon walking in on her boyfriend with another woman, moves into an apartment with three ridiculous guys. the show is sweet, as they all learn how to deal with the quirks that each one brings to the table. but mostly the main character, jess, is just to cute. in so many ways do i want to be her when i grow up. here are a few of my favorite clips:



 this one truly shows how ridiculous and quirky she can be (the teeth!)...she just seems like she would be such a cool teacher.

 

this one reminds me a lot of myself...hating horror movies, ruining movies because i talk during them and getting easily distracted by ice cream...

 

 the awkwardness in the clip just made me want to die laughing.

 

 and...the ribbon hat. best ever.

there are also several jess quotations that i just love...

-in a rant to a woman who does not like her, jess says:
"I brake for birds, I rock a lot of polka dots, I have touched glitter in the last 24 hours, [...] and I find it fundamentally strange that you’re not a dessert person. That’s just weird, and it freaks me out. And I’m sorry I don’t talk like Murphy Brown, and I hate your pantsuit. I wish it had ribbons on it, or something to make it just slightly cuter....I’m about to go pay this $800 fine, and my checks have baby farm animals on them, bitch!" (of course if i could have actually found a clip of this, it would have been way better, but this is still great...)

-to the same woman:

"If I acted like you at work my students would turn in really weird, dark dioramas."

-"Are you sure you're okay? You're walking like a Disney witch. Let me drive you to your doctor."


-"He's so soft, like a towel."

-Jess: "$550 for the TV?! Seems a little steep. I'm gonna write down a figure, and this is as high as I'll go."

Pawnshop dude: "You drew a smiley face."

-"Jess: No! I can't call Spencer I haven't talked to him since he cheated on me with that ho! Actually, that's not fair. She might be a really nice ho."

-"I have to get to school cause it's astronomy day and I'm dressing up as Galileo, so I have to put on my beard."

-Schmidt: "I'll take you through the whole thing. I'll be like your guide."
Jess: "Like Gandolf through Middle Earth?"
Schmidt: "Probably not like... Okay, first of all, let's take the Lord of the Rings references and put them in a deep, dark cave, where no one's gonna find them. Ever."
Jess: "Except Smeagle. He lives in a cave."


OH, and she sings. all the time. about everything that she's doing. she even made up her own theme song. anyway, i just really want to be her when i grow up. because apparently my life is centered around TV :P